40 “What’s the Difference Between” Jokes That Will Make You Chuckle
From cheeky to punny, these hilarious "what's the difference between" jokes are guaranteed to bring in the laughs.
Deliver the humor by cracking these funny “what’s the difference between” jokes
Who doesn’t love to tell (and hear) a great joke? Some people love short jokes, while others can’t get enough of “what do you call?” jokes. There’s one category of jokes, though, that has some of the funniest jokes out there: “what’s the difference between” jokes.
These jokes capture the humor (and cheekiness) in comparing everyday objects and situations. Read on and let the laughing commence. If your children are looking for some laughs, too, check out these top knock-knock jokes for kids.
1. What’s the difference between a good joke and a bad joke timing.
2. What’s the difference between a hungry pirate and a drunken pirate?
One has a rumbling tummy, and the other’s a tumbling rummy.
3. What’s the difference between mitosis and escaping prison?
Nothing; they both require splitting from cells.
4. What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
You’ll see one later and one in a while.
5. What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.
6. What’s the difference between ice cream and your advice?
I asked for the ice cream.
7. What’s the difference between the bird flu and the swine flu?
One requires tweetment and the other an oinkment.
8. What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire.
9. What’s the difference between humans and frogs?
Humans croak once, but frogs croak all the time.
10. What’s the difference between love and marriage?
Love is blind and marriage is an eye-opener.
Want to make your sweetheart laugh? Tell them one of these flirty knock-knock jokes.
11. What’s the difference between a good idea and a bad idea?
Your opinion.
12. What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy?
I don’t know and I don’t care.
13. What’s the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?
February 14th.
14. What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other is a pause at the end of a clause.
15. What’s the difference between a man and a computer?
You only have to tell a computer to do something once.
16. What’s the difference between a scratch-and-sniff book and a witch’s book?
One is a book of smells; the other is a book of spells.
17. What’s the difference between a house and a mansion?
$13 million.
18. What’s the difference between the Grinch and a liar?
One lives on a fictional mountain and the other lives on mountains of fiction.
19. What’s the difference between a broken clock and the weatherman?
A broken clock is right twice a day.
20. What’s the difference between a $20 ring and a $200 ring?
How bad you messed up.
Need more laughs? These corny jokes will do the trick.
21. What’s the difference between the first three letters of the alphabet and a rare blood type?
One is ABC; the other is AB, see?
22. What’s the difference between a tight pair of shoes and the mailman?
Nothing; they both make your dogs bark.
23. What’s the difference between a 3K and a leaky sink?
One is a little run and the other runs a little.
24. What’s the difference between chemistry jokes and physics jokes?
Chemistry jokes can be funny periodically, but physics jokes have more potential.
25. What’s the difference between a calculator and a flaky friend?
You can count on a calculator.
26. What’s the difference between a pair of genes and a pair of jeans?
One is hereditary; the other helps her get ready.
27. What’s the difference between a piano and a tuna?
You can tuna piano, but you can’t piano a tuna.
28. What’s the difference between torpedoes and loose lips?
Nothing; they both sink ships.
29. What’s the difference between a greedy person and a shrimp?
One is selfish; the other is shellfish.
30. What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
You can roast beef, but you can’t pee soup.
That joke will definitely make the kids laugh (and these other short jokes for kids will, too!).
31. What’s the difference between a teacher and a cynic?
A teacher answers your questions; a cynic questions your answers.
32. What’s the difference between a baby carrot and a tangerine?
One is small and orange; the other is a small orange.
33. What’s the difference between a pencil and someone you’re arguing with?
The pencil has a point.
34. What’s the difference between a hopeless romantic and an Italian exterminator?
One chases romance, the other chases Rome ants.
35. What’s the difference between a merry-go-round and someone caught in a lie?
Nothing; they both go in circles until they’re stopped.
36. What’s the difference between a pirate and a jeweler?
One watches the seas while the other sees the watches.
37. What’s the difference between a good week and a great week?
If your spouse is away on business.
38. What’s the difference between ducks and dine-and-dashers?
Ducks take care of their bills.
39. Whats the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls?
Their seasoning.
40. What’s the difference between a good night and a great night?
How you tell the story the next morning.
Next, read these anti-jokes you can’t help but laugh at.